Pulling back

I’ve coerced myself into cramming a gentle yoga class into a schedule of vigorous asana, work, and social obligations because as a yoga instructor and long-time practitioner, I intellectually understood the benefits of placing my body into a suggested posture and passively allowing the pose to work its magic.  I say “intellectually” because while wanting to embrace the practice, I experienced resistance toward constructive rest, and privately I felt my instructor espoused the benefits of restoration in attempt to assuage the collective guilt held by a roomful of yogis choosing laziness and calling it practice.   

Recently, my ambivalence lifted when I let go of my judging mind and trusted that the practice was practical, valuable, and perhaps critical in a world of yang driven ambition, results-focused goals, and mindless action. I set an intention of spaciousness, and something miraculous followed….an effortless lucidity. As my body softened into the progression of asanas, my mind followed and mental chatter ceased. Answers to unsolicited questions bubbled into consciousness, as did resolution to seemingly unreconcilable problems.  A veil of confusion lifted as I freed myself from effort and striving.

Now, instead of mentally accepting the practice, I experientially yield to restorative yoga and have tapped into a wellspring of creativity and self-knowledge in the act of release.  In Patanjali’s Yoga Sutra we find “Yogash citta -vritti nirodhah”, which translates as: When you stop identifying with your thoughts and fluctuations of the mind, then there is Yoga.  Through the practice of restorative yoga I have experienced this sutra and rediscovered Yoga.